


Oh My Love, How Long Has It Been

by TheGirlWithTheRedBalloon



Series: Come A Little Closer [2]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Female Danny "Danno" Williams
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-06-24 03:32:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15621624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGirlWithTheRedBalloon/pseuds/TheGirlWithTheRedBalloon
Summary: Steve almost dies.  Danny has a bit of an epiphany.  The truth will out.Just a heads up, Danny’s a woman in this fic.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I wanted to write a longer (better) version of what I'd already put up. Basically a rewrite of season 6 finale but then it veers sharply out of canon.
> 
> All mistakes are mine because nobody helps me edit so if you see a mistake, please let me know.
> 
> Constructive feedback is always welcome. Let me know what you think!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so the first couple chapters are mostly just an episode rewrite but hang in there cuz it's gonna get better.

“We got a bogie at 8 o’clock,” Danny shouts. Steve looks to his left and sees a grey helicopter flying parallel to their plane. No markings. Steve and Danny watch as the aircraft door opens and a man opens fire. Bullets hit the plane. Danny yells at Steve to get down and the plane wobbles in the air. When Danny looks up, she sees Steve hunched over in pain. He groans and when she pulls him back, her mouth goes dry. 

“Oh, jeez,” she can only whisper. Steve’s been hit, red blooming on his chest. He already looks pale, sweat beading on his skin. “Babe, no. Oh no.” She doesn’t know what to do. They’re flying over the ocean, fifty or so miles from O’ahu. She’s not a pilot or a medic or even level headed enough right now to do much other than stare at Steve, blood seeping through fingers closed tightly over his wound.

Then the plane veers sharply to the right and she kicks into action. Danny grabs the controls and levels out the plane enough to grab the radio. “Mayday,” she can’t keep the shaking from her voice. “Mayday. I’m in a Cessna aircraft en route to O’ahu.” She swallows thickly. “And I have a serious, serious problem.” Steve groans lightly in the background. “Repeat. Mayday, mayday. Our pilot has been shot.” She looks over at him. Steve’s face is tensed in pain, his skin paling by the minute, he’s mumbling incoherently. _Oh god, Steve._ “Request immediate assistance.” The radio crackles and a voice comes through.

“This is Honolulu International Control. We read you. Go ahead.” Danny panics for a moment because she has to break their cover and she’s mildly worried about their almost forgotten passenger in the back. There’s no question, though her voice breaks a little as she speaks.

“This is Detective Danny Williams with the Five-0 task force. I-I need help landing this plane.”

“You’re a cop?” Dae Wan asks from her left. She looks over her shoulder and sees him reach for a gun so she pulls hers, letting go of the controls. Danny only just notices that he looks terrified. “Put down the gun!” The plane starts going down.

“Put yours down.” _Is this guy serious?_ She doesn’t have time for this.

“Put down the gun. I’m not gonna ask again.”

“It’s really bad.” Steve’s words are slurred and low, he’s dangerously white. Danny takes her eyes off Dae Wan to look at him.

“Hang on, hang on,” she tells him. The radio comes on again telling her to switch channels. The asshole in the back tells her not to answer it. “If I don’t answer it, we’re gonna die. Both of us.” It’s taking every ounce of control she has left to stay calm. “Either we shoot each other or this plane goes down. You understand that? Does that make sense to you?” Dae Wan looks to the radio as the man on the other side asks if she copies. Danny looks to Steve who’s beginning to pass out. “Stay awake.” She shakes his shoulder. “Steve. Steve?” He mutters something and she just can’t handle it anymore. “All right, you know what?” She drops her gun and turns around, grabbing the controls. “You win. You wanna shoot me, shoot me. Go ahead. But who’s gonna fly this plane, huh?” Steve mumbles again as Dae Wan replies, the gun now nearly pressed to her head.

“Well, apparently you can’t fly it either.” The guy just won’t listen and she’s starting to panic.

“That’s true,” she swallows. “But the people on the other end can, all right? You wanna shoot me, come sit in my lap, be my guest! Do it, all right?” She’s trying to stay calm but she knows she sounds frantic. Steve’s bleeding out beside her, she’s got a gun to her head, and no clue how to fly this plane. It’s all too overwhelming. “Look, I promise you…” Steve’s gonna hate her for this but he’s barely moving so really, she has no choice. “I land this plane safely, you and I will pick up right where we left off, okay?” She knows she’s begging and she’s not proud of it but Steve’s safety is so much more important that at this point, she just doesn’t care. “Alright! Huh?” She yells, can’t help it. She doesn’t know how long she’s going to be able to keep herself together.

But when Dae Wan gives her an “Okay,” she breathes hard and picks up the radio. “Switching to Channel 17.” She clicks the switches and tries to stay calm. “You’re all right, Steve.” But what he says next does nothing to help her.

“I’m gonna die, Danny.”

“No, you’re not,” she very nearly yells at him. “Just hang in there. You’re gonna be all right, all right?” She scratches at the back of her head, fingers brushing at the short hairs, and takes a few breaths that do nothing to calm her before speaking into the radio.

“Again, this is Detective Danny Williams. I’m in a Cessna aircraft and I’m headed your way. Our pilot, my colleague, has been shot. He’s got multiple gunshot wounds.” She glances over again and falters because there is just so much blood. _How is there so much blood?_ “I need EMT standing by right when we get this thing on the ground, which I have no clue, zero clue, how to do. Over.”

The man on the line understands and he guides her into slowing the aircraft down. Once the plane has slowed and she’s followed all the directions, she looks over at her partner. “Steve?” She shakes him but he’s passed out. His breathing is shallow and he’s not holding onto his wound anymore, his arms have gone lax. “Babe?” She looks down and sees more blood pooled into the carpet, nearly black there’s so much of it. “Oh, no. No.” She closes her eyes and tries to keep the panic down. “Steve?” No response. “Uh, all right, all right, you—” she says to Dae Wan. “—I need you to do something for me. All right?”

“Focus on getting the plane down.” She doesn’t have time to argue with a criminal.

“Just do what I—”

“Don’t talk to me!”

“Do what I tell you to do or I’m gonna drop this thing in the water. You understand?” She’s dead serious and this time her voice is steady. The idiot asks what she wants, survival prized above pride at the moment. “I want you to put your hand on his neck and tell me if you feel a pulse, okay?” Dae Wan’s hand flutters around Steve’s neck for a brief second before he gives up.

“I don’t—I don’t know!”

“What do you mean, you don’t know? Keep your hand on his neck!” The panic is turning to anger is turning to fear and Danny yells at him. She almost wishes he wouldn’t try again because she’s not sure she wants to know, with the way Steve is so pale and still. “Either you feel a pulse or you don’t!”

The emergency alarm goes off. Danny looks around, defeated, before grabbing the radio.

“Control, I got—I got an alarm and I don’t know what it is.” Control tells her to check her gauges. “What do I see? I see a lot of gauges!” The fear is quickly bubbling to the top at this point. He asks her airspeed. 155, she tells him. Altitude? 500 but falling. Fuel? Her blood goes cold. “No good. Uh, the uh, the needle is right at zero.” So now they’re running out of fuel too, it’s leaking from the bullet holes in the side of the plane.

She looks to Steve again. He’s still out. His lips are pale. Danny wants to scream and cry but she’s got to get them down. Only they’re still over the Pacific.

“We need to get you down as soon as possible.” Control reads her mind over the radio. “The Coast Guard has been notified. Stand by for emergency ditch procedure.” Dae Wan looks at her, panic in his eyes.

“Wha—what does he mean by ‘ditch’?’”

“I don’t know. What do you mean by ditch?” She asks, already dreading the answer.

“Detective, based on your current altitude, airspeed, and available fuel, you’re never gonna make the runway.” Yeah, that’s bad. She blows a puff of air out slowly. She’s still trying to keep calm but it’s a losing battle. Meanwhile, Dae Wan is freaking out.

“He said we have to ditch.”

“Yeah, well, we’re not ditching.” The engine grumbles and sputters in response. The left side propeller stops spinning. _Great._ She picks up the radio. “Control, we just—” The right propeller sputters and stops. “—Lost both of our engines.”

“All right, Detective. Beneath the dash is a large red handle.” She looks and locates it. “Pull it to feather your prop, but don’t try fight gravity.”

“Copy, got that.” She pulls it and the plane stills.

“Okay, Detective, next to the radio controls are your landing gear settings. There’s a switch labeled ‘up water,’ flip it. Lower your flaps one more peg to the landing position.” Danny follows his orders and hears a clanking. “Now you’re gonna have to put her down on the water. Adjust your course to 175 degrees and let yourself glide.”

Danny looks again at Steve. She feels like throwing up when she nudges him and he just jostles around, head rolling on the headrest. He can’t die on her, he can’t. She won’t let him. This isn’t how it was supposed to happen. There’s so much left to do, to say. Too many bad guys that need to be caught, doors that need to be kicked open, buildings to be jumped off. It’s telling that she’s ready to trade more of Steve’s heart-attack inducing stunts for him living through this. Her mind is spinning so she takes more deep breaths.

“Uh, all right,” she takes another breath and pushes her fear aside, there isn’t time for it. “Uh, control, that’s—that’s not gonna work, okay? My—my partner, he’s, uh, unconscious. If I put this thing down on the water, I’m not gonna be able to get him out of the plane and he’s gonna drown.” Her voice breaks as she gets the last bit out.

“You don’t have a choice, Detective.” The world narrows and all she can think is that this guy wants her to let her partner drown. The anger returns. There is no way in hell she’s letting that happen.

“Yeah, I-I-I gotta choice,” she stutters out. “I’m gonna put this thing down on the beach, okay?” She grips the controls.

“Detective,” the voice says. “We strongly advise against that. I understand your concern for your friend, but consider yourself. Your best chance of survival is a water landing.”

Danny’s vision goes red and for a flashing moment she thinks that if her best chance is one Steve doesn’t make it out of alive, then it’s not even worth it. It scares her, briefly, that she’d rather die alongside Steve than live in a world without him. There’s another emotion there, twisting in her gut, and she knows its name. And she knows that now is not the time to ponder on how long it’s been there. They’ll have time, plenty enough, later.

“Listen, I’m not gonna put it down in the water. I’m gonna put this thing down on the beach, okay? Clear the beach, I’m coming in.” She tries to even out her breathing and adjusts her grip on the controls. “Alright, here we go.”

“You’re gonna kill all of us,” Dae Wan speaks up.

“Shut up, shut up.” She knows it’s a definite possibility but when she glances over to Steve and her heart lodges itself in her throat, she also knows it’s the only choice she’s got. She pulls the seatbelt over his chest and it clicks in. “Hey, Steve, listen to me,” she’s gripping his shoulder. “I know you’ve never been any good at listening to me but right now you got no choice, you stubborn son of a bitch.” She thinks she can see the expression he’d make at that if he weren’t in the state he is. She’s crying at this point; her nose is tingly up high in her sinuses and her cheeks are wet but she doesn’t care. “Do not die.” It comes out cracked, on a half sob. And she’s shaking his shoulder, her fist twisted so hard into the fabric she thinks it might tear. “Hey! Listen to me!” She sniffles and clears her throat. “Do not die, okay? I’m not landing this thing for you to die on me! You understand? Huh?” She’s yelling at him through her tears and she places a hand on his ghostly face. “Good,” she forces herself to let go and turns back to the controls. “All right, here we go.”

The beach is close enough that she can clearly see individual boats floating in the bay. The emergency alarm is blaring and she takes steady breaths. “Hold on, hold on,” she says it more to herself than Dae Wan, who she has nearly completely forgotten about now. “Hold on!” The water is rising up to meet them and she’s afraid she’s not gonna make it to the beach. The controls feel like they’re fighting her and she’s shaking in her seat but holds on tightly.

They’re coming in fast. She clenches her jaw and the plane hits the water, bouncing roughly, and she’s grateful she remembered to buckle Steve in. They hit the sand and she jerks sharply back and forth. Her cheek hits the controls.

Finally, the plane stops. It’s covered in sand, parts have busted off, and there’s a steady stream of white smoke. Barely registering her own pain, Danny unbuckles Steve. Someone pulls off Steve’s window and suddenly there’s Chin, worry and fear in his eyes.

“Come on, he’s still alive!” She’s gripping Steve’s shoulder. “Come on!” She shouts at them. She hears Lou’s voice but she’s not listening. He and Chin help her get Steve turned around and out of the plane as gently as circumstances will allow. She climbs out after them, finally noticing there’s a hurt in her ribs. There’s blood on her face, in her mouth, but she makes a beeline to where they’ve set Steve down in the sand. She watches the EMTs cut open his shirt and almost has to look away.

They get Steve bandaged enough to get him in the ambulance and Danny climbs right in after him, not willing to let him out of her sight. Her ears are ringing a steady chorus of _you’re not going to die on me Steve_ as she watches them work in the vehicle as it speeds down the highway. She looks down and she’s not even sure when it happened but she’s got her hand wrapped around one of Steve’s. She grips it tighter to steady herself but his skin is cold and clammy and it doesn’t have the desired effect.

They finally reach the hospital and Danny follows Steve’s stretcher, a hand on her ribs. She reaches out and her fingers just brush through his hair as she lets him go. A nurse comes over to check on her but she brushes her off, watching Steve disappear around the corner.

“Danny!” She turns around and sees the rest of the team. “Where is he?” Kono asks.

“They rushed him into surgery, the EMT said he lost a lot of blood.” Danny is shaking and there’s a strange gagging sound coming from somewhere she can’t see until she realizes it’s her. She’s sobbing, tears and sweat and blood running down her face. She knows she must look disgusting but Lou bends down and leans in close.

“Hey, you know Steve is as tough as they come, Danny, okay?” He places a hand on her shoulder. “You know he’s not gonna go out without a fight.”

“Yeah, yeah.” But she remembers what Steve said to her in the plane, the way his voice sounded as he slurred out the words. _I’m gonna die, Danny._ She shuts her eyes tight against the thought and when she opens them, they’re fierce. “Yeah,” she says, moving around their group and heading to the doors.

“Hey, where are you going?” Chin calls after her. “You need to get yourself checked out!”

“I’m fine, come on.” She limps down the hall. She’s scared and she’s in pain but she’s angry, too. And it’s the anger that lifts her shoulders and makes her move.

“Danny!” They shout in unison but she keeps walking, so they follow her. _This isn’t over yet._


	2. Chapter 2

She doesn’t slow down when she gets back to the office, going straight to the holding cell where they’re keeping Dae Wan. She opens the door, ignores whatever he’s saying to her, and slams her fist into his jaw. Pain blooms across her body but she’s glad. It keeps her angry. Chin, Kono, and Lou come through the door. She sees Chin give her a look but she ignores him too. Her voice dangerously calm, she asks:

“Who were the guys in the helicopter, huh?” She feels something curl in her gut, the same thing she felt when she was young and stupid, before the idea of being a cop ever crossed her mind. The same thing she felt that night, years ago in Columbia with Steve at her back when she put a bullet between the eyes of Matty’s murderer. “Huh? Were they business rivals?” She pants, her blood simmers in her veins. “I want a name. You need to give me a name.”

Dae Wan looks torn between saving himself and keeping his mouth shut but eventually he gives her what she needs.

Half an hour later, Danny’s got a vest on over her broken ribs and the team is busting into a drug op. They go in hot and Danny is half grateful for the release. They take out the men easily enough. Danny moves through the space and spots one guy trying to limp away. She catches a glimpse of his face and immediately recognizes him as the shooter from the helicopter. So, she follows him.

She’s calm—it doesn’t surprise her as much as she thinks it should—as she replaces the empty clip with a full one. She cocks her gun, stalking after him. He shoots at her, misses. She’s only a few feet away. That familiar curl is back as she raises her gun and gets him in the shoulder, barely blinking. She stands over him, kicks the bastard’s gun aside and aims straight down at him.

“Do it,” he says. And oh, does she want to. “Go ahead.” The blood is thrumming in her ears, her pulse beating hard and steady. She lines up the shot, remembers Steve in the plane, his blood on his hands. “Do it.” The curl in her stomach tightens. She lowers the gun. This isn’t what Steve would want. The thought of disappointing him makes her turn around, head back to the team.

But something stops her. She nearly watched her best friend, the man she… blead out in front of her. And this man, this worm on the ground at her feet, was responsible for everything. Her blood boils and she turns back, raising her gun, lining up the shot again. There’s a rush in her ears, a thick static. _No, no this isn’t the way._ It’s like resisting gravity but she lowers her gun. She can’t do it. She’s not entirely sure she’s glad she can’t, but that doesn’t matter. She sees her team rushing towards her and she’s thankful, at least, that they didn’t witness her indecisiveness. She heads to meet them and her phone rings.

“Hello?” She listens as the doctor on the other end speaks but only really registers that Steve is in danger. Seeing her expression, Chin asks:

“What is it?”

“It’s Steve. Come on.”

They reach the hospital in a dangerously short amount of time and follow Danny down the halls. The doctor rounds the corner.

“Hey, doc,” Danny says, stopping in the middle of the hall. “What’s going on?” She reads his face and she knows.

“I’m afraid it’s not good news. Commander McGarrett has suffered a devastating trauma to his liver. A bullet has cut it into multiple fragments, making the entire organ inoperable. If he doesn’t receive a new liver in the next few hours, he will die.”

It echoes in Danny’s head, as if her brain is hollow but for the words _“hewilldiehewilldiehewilldie.”_ She can’t breathe. Her stomach jumps into her throat and she nearly vomits in the hall. Kono grabs her shoulders to steady her and Danny takes several deep breaths.

“I’m in.” She hears Lou behind her and a “me too” from Chin.

“Same here,” Kono says at her right.

“We certainly can run some tests,” the doctor says. “And determine which, if any of you, are the correct tissue match.” Danny’s stomach settles, finally, and she chimes in.

“Let me, um, just save everybody some time,” she clears her throat, looking at them all. “Uh, Steve and I are the same blood type. Um, so let’s just—let’s use mine.” It’s not even a question. And she knows there’s probably more to it than that but she’s certain that she’s a match.

She sends Kono to pick up Grace from school and explain the situation to her daughter before the operation. Barely a half an hour later, she’s in a hospital gown, an IV in her arm. She says a few words to the doctor before spotting her daughter.

“Hey, what are you doing, monkey?” Danny tries to be light, a smile on her lips, but she sees the tears on Grace’s cheeks as she comes close and lays her head on her mother’s chest, arms wrapped around her. “Oh, hey. You know I got a broken rib, right?” But Grace doesn’t seem to care, just hangs on. Danny holds her, one hand at Grace’s back the other behind her head. She sees Kono, who smiles and gives them space. “What are you doing, huh?” Danny asks as Grace lets go and stands up. “What are you upset for? Everything’s gonna be alright, I promise.” Grace nods and smiles weakly as Danny wipes away her tears. She smiles up at her daughter, such strength in those bright brown eyes.

Danny wonders how many of the tears are for her and how many are for Steve. Steve who has been there for the both of them since Grace was nine, who’s taken her surfing and running on weekends, who’s made her laugh and smile, who’s helped take care of her right alongside her own mother. That emotion from before—the one she dared not name while Steve was bleeding out onto the plane’s carpet—is back and it’s twisting around her heart and Danny wants to both laugh and cry. She knows she has to tell him, knows he deserves the truth. Hell, she deserves it too.

Grace walks with Danny as she’s wheeled down the halls to the operating room. Their hands clasped the whole way. They pass by the window and Grace’s fingers tight when she sees Steve, fresh tears running down her face. Then they have to let go. And Danny is wheeled into the room and prepared for surgery.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is barely edited so if it sucks, sorry. Also, If it's terrible, please let me know.

The doctors tell her the operation took a total of four hours. She wouldn’t have known it otherwise, what with all the drugs she’s still waking up from. They also tell her that all of their friends and family stayed in the waiting room the whole time just to make sure they were there to hear the good news. Obviously, Danny knows they’d stayed for Steve—he was the one in danger, the one who’d almost died—and she smiles at that. She’s grateful that she’s found such a wonderful 'ohana. It doesn’t startle her anymore to think of their ragtag band as family, to think of Hawaii as home. How could it possibly be any different?

The first two days after the surgery are stressful. Steve’s still in the ICU and she’s on mandatory best rest, which means the nurses won’t even let her see him. She fights it. Once. Tries to wrestle her way out of bed a couple hours after she wakes up before she’s caught by a nurse. But she’s got two broken ribs and only half a liver so she relents, albeit very reluctantly, settling for constant updates on his recovery.

When she wakes on the third morning, it’s to Steve asleep in a bed next to her, almost close enough to touch. Her immediate reaction is to get up and check on him but she’s still in no condition to. When the panic fades, she grins, thinking it may be the only time she’s ever been awake before him. But he’s been out on anesthesia for the past 48 plus hours so she’s not exactly happy about it.

Steve looks peaceful in his sleep. All lines of pain and stress are gone from his eyes, there’s no hard crease between his brows. There’s color in his face and she thinks she might start crying again. She’ll never forget how close to death he looked, so pallid and limp. She clears her throat softly and shakes away the thoughts. He’s here, alive. That’s what matters. 

And then there’s the other problem that needs addressing. Danny is hyper aware of her heart thumping in her chest as she watches Steve sleep. Staying in the same recovery room probably won’t help her case and she thinks bringing it up immediately, even just to get it off her chest, is definitely not the right way to go about things. Maybe she should tell someone else first. Kono comes to mind. She’s in unfamiliar territory here and having a second opinion from a friend would probably be good start.

A nurse—the same one who wrangled her back to bed after she first woke up—comes in a little later to check on them and asks if she can get Danny anything.

“Coffee, please. Before he wakes up,” she jokes softly. It comes easily and she briefly thinks that telling Steve the truth won’t really change their relationship. She can’t tell if that makes her happy or not. The nurse just chuckles. She’s a kind-faced woman, early fifties maybe. She’s checking Steve’s bandages.

“You two together?”

“Yes,” she replies without thinking. “Well no, not like—we’re partners.” She’s flustered, trying to find the right words. “We work together,” she finishes weakly. Her face feels hot but the nurse just smiles knowingly, which only makes things worse. “Is it really that obvious?” She asks tentatively, because she’s not sure if knowing will make her feel better. The nurse’s eyes twinkle in the dim light.

“Yes, dear.” Danny groans and presses herself into the mattress, as if it can swallow her whole. The nurse comes over to check her dressings and she smiles sweetly. “He doesn’t know, does he?” Danny’s usually not one to hold back anyway but something about this woman makes her feel comfortable confessing everything. She shakes her head. “How long?” Danny chuckles.

“I’m not sure I really knew until yesterday, but if I had to guess,” she takes a deep breath to steady herself. “I’d say about six years.” Since Steve showed up at Meka’s funeral. Six damn years. The nurse hums and Danny’s hackles go up. “What? What’s that look for?”

“It’s a lot of waisted time.”

And it hurts about as much as you can expect because that’s the thought Danny’s been avoiding. How long could they have had more? How long did they keep themselves in the dark? _They_ , Danny is sure to emphasize because she knows it’s not just her, it’s been never just her. She doesn’t think Steve knows how she feels but they’ve toed that line between professional and flirtatious too many times to count in the years that they’ve been partners. And she knows Steve, knows him well enough to know when he’s holding back. Danny wonders what’s stopped them from reaching for more for so long.

Of course, she knows it’s the nature of their work, of their professional relationship. It’s easier, sometimes, to just focus on the job. Only, Steve has become increasingly reckless in their work. And perhaps that’s why it broke through the surface when it did. Confronting one’s mortality has an uncanny way of putting life sharply into perspective.

The nurse leaves shortly after finding Danny some coffee and giving her a few stern words about trying to get out of bed again. So, she lay there, in the growing morning light, trying to find the words she’ll say to Steve when the time is right.

But that’s the other thing. The time is never right. They’ve had so many moments when the words nearly bubbled out but never did. And it’s so easy for her to think of those moments now. Now that she knows them for what they are.

And it’s not like they’ve never said the words before. They’ve said it so many times that it’s become part of their everyday conversations, said it without flinching, without even thinking about it. It’s so natural at this point that she’s not sure saying it now would make it mean more than it already does. And she’s also not entirely sure she’s ever meant it any differently than she does now. It scares her to think she’s ignored something so vital about their relationship for such a long time. And maybe ignored isn’t the right word, maybe it’s more than that. She thinks is likely that she’s actively pushed against it, knowing that Steve’s recklessness would only make her worry more if they were to be romantically involved.

She looks over at Steve, tries to memorize this peace because she knows it won’t last. It’s only a matter of time before he wakes up and it breaks. She’s aware she’s staring. She doesn’t care, just lets herself admire him while she can. She can see the grey in his hair, wonders what it would be like to just run her hands through it without the pretense of checking for wounds. The stubble on his jaw is growing. His strong chest is rising and falling with steady breaths, his lips slack and parted.

Danny closes her eyes and tries to settle back into sleep but now she’s thinking about his lips and it isn’t helping. She growls out a frustrated sigh and _oh, that makes sense._ A side effect of her now apparent sexual frustration is anger and that would explain, she thinks, why Steve so easily brings it out in her. She shakes her head at that. She can’t blame him for her reactions, that’s childish. She’s getting nowhere so she resolutely puts it out of her mind for now.

Eventually, Danny falls asleep. Its restless though, heavily featuring dozens of scenarios much worse than the reality of the last few days. Hours later, she’s woken softly by her daughter pressing a kiss to her forehead. She smiles up at Grace.

“Hi, Danno.” She looks concerned but the tears from days ago are gone. Danny lifts a hand and brushes her fingers through Grace’s hair.

“Hey,” her voice is rough from sleep. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes. You here with your dad?” Grace nods and looks to the door where Richard is standing, lurking somewhat uncomfortably in the doorway. Danny looks over and he waves to her.

“I’m gonna grab a coffee, let you two talk.” He leaves but not before Danny catches him throwing a glance between her and Steve. Grace look over at Steve too, those brown eyes full of worry. Danny takes her hand and rubs circles into the back of her palm.

“He’s gonna be fine,” she reassures her daughter. “You know how stubborn he is. Though he’ll probably just throw himself back into danger the first chance he gets.”

“Mom,” Grace chides.

“Hey, I love him but it’s true.” She sighs, genuinely worried about how Steve will handle life after the transplant. She knows it’s going to be hard for him, and she’s also sure it will be the cause of several future arguments. How she’s going to convince him to slow down—when he’s never showed much interest in following her advice before—is beyond her. The thought of handcuffing him to her flashes in her mind which then leads to other thoughts and— _oh boy, now is not the time._

“How are you doing?” Grace asks, settling down at her mother’s side and squeezing her hand.

“I’m good. Really, the Jell-O here is high quality.” That gets her a laugh and a bright smile and Danny feels better instantly. The pair of them talk in hushed tones for a while, discussing Grace’s new school project and surfing plans when Danny and Uncle Steve are better. Then her father comes to collect Grace and Danny’s alone.

She asks the nurse who drops off her lunch to please find her phone. Once it’s been located, she makes a quick call to Kono, asking if she can swing by the next day.

“You alright?” There’s heavy concern in her voice when she asks and Danny is quick to reassure her.

“Yeah, I uh… just need a second opinion on something. I’ll tell you tomorrow.”

Danny spends the rest of the day trying to keep her mind occupied. She reads through the old magazines left on the nightstand, watches a game on mute, she even manages to get a nurse to wheel her around the floor a couple times. Steve finally wakes up late in the afternoon and for a while there’s a flurry of activity in the room. The doctor who performed the surgery comes in to check on them both though Steve’s still not particularly lucid.

When the doctor leaves, Steve looks at her. It’s a heavy gaze and it nearly makes Danny squirm. He seems incredibly coherent for having just woken and she thinks he’s going to say something but he just smiles faintly and falls back to sleep. It’s not quite as drug induced now and she can tell because he’s snoring softly. She thinks how nice it would be to curl up with him, to hold him through the night. Tomorrow she’ll talk with Kono and then maybe then she’ll know what to do.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its another fairly short chapter, sorry. But coming soon... Steve's awake!

Kono comes by around ten in the morning swinging a bag of malasadas at her side. Four days of shitty hospital food and Danny is practically drooling at the sight. Steve is awake but he’s still groggy from the meds so they don’t get to talk much before he falls asleep again. Kono helps her into a wheelchair—the nurse is adamant about it despite Danny’s protesting—and wheels her down to the cafeteria. They eat in silence for a moment. Silence save for the sigh of appreciation as Danny devours the treat.

“Kono, you are an angel,” Danny says, voice muffled as she wipes powdered sugar from her mouth. The young woman laughs.

“The food here is that bad, huh?” She asks it with a smile and crinkles up the now empty bag.

“You have no idea.” Danny takes a sip of her coffee, it’s weak but it helps settle the nerves that come creeping back. Kono watches her. They don’t speak for a few moments as Danny waits for Kono to push. Eventually she does, her curiosity too strong.

“So,” Kono leans forward and places her arms on the table. “You mentioned needing my opinion on something.” Danny looks up at her from her mug. She thinks about lying, saving herself from potential humiliation, but she knows she can trust Kono. Danny takes a deep breath.

“Yeah,” she drags out, rubbing at the back of her neck. “I uh… I’ve got myself into a… um, a bit of a mess.” Kono just waits patiently. Danny looks down again, wringing her hands as she tries to put it into words. “It’s about Steve. I uh…” Then she looks at Kono and sees the telltale glint of amusement in her eyes and the quirk of her smile. Danny huffs and falls back into her chair. “You knew?” She sounds accusatory but Kono only laughs. “What the hell?” Danny lets her head sink to the table and she bangs it against the hard plastic. Kono quiets and reaches out, taking Danny’s hand.

“I saw what happened during the raid,” Kono says gently. Danny looks up slowly, brushing her short hair from her eyes. “If it had been Adam’s life on the line? I don’t know if I could have held back like you did.”

“Is that when you figured it out?” She asks and Kono sits back.

“No way! You and Steve,” she chuckles. “You guys are so obvious. Have been since like the day I met you.” Danny groans. “I always wondered why neither of you made a move.” Danny looks off to the side where an elderly couple is sitting together. She swallows thickly before speaking.

“I think it was just easier that way,” she clears her throat and looks back to Kono. “You know? To just call him a friend rather have to notice that my heart was in pieces every time something like this,” she gestures to the space they’re in, referring to the whole of the hospital. “Happens. But now? Now I don’t think it’s possible to ignore.” She leans forward, clutching Kono’s hand. “He almost died. And Kono, that restraint back at the airfield,” she shakes her head and swallows. She doesn’t want to think about what she might have done. “I know I need to tell him. But I just… I don’t want it change anything. I don’t want to ruin what we’ve got.”

“Boss,” Kono laughs at her. “I don’t think you could be more in love with each other if you tried. Everyone already thinks you guys are together.”

“But do you think he wants that?”

“Do you?” Kono asks, her eyes full of kindness. Danny doesn’t even hesitate; the words are right on her tongue.

“I do, yeah. I want to stop lying to myself. And to him. It isn’t fair to either of us.” And suddenly she’s alert. The nervous energy that had been buzzing under her skin whenever she thought about it is gone, replaced with an overwhelming sense of urgency. She feels impatient, the weight of the truth settling against her healing ribs.

“Feeling better?” Kono asks with a smile as she’s heading out the door, Danny back in her room. They spend a few hours chatting about nonsense and Chin showed up later so by the time Danny is wheeled back to Steve, she’s quite tired.

“I’m not sure yet, but I will be. Thank you.” Kono leaves and Chin throws her a look so Danny tells him to ask his cousin for the details. She knows they want what’s best for her. Though she’s not sure getting romantically involved with her partner really is the best idea, logically speaking. She’s fairly sure it’ll make her stress levels go through the roof.

She wheels herself over to Steve’s side. He’s asleep, again and snoring softly. She smiles and tucks it away to tease him with later. She takes his hand and lightly traces the veins on the back of his palm. He’s so still that she can’t help it when her mind recalls the way he looked in the plane, blood soaking into the carpet. She squeezes her eyes against the memory but it’s as if it has imprinted itself on the back of her eyelids. She realizes that she’s never going to get away from it, from the vision of Steve dying, from the thought of losing him on the job. It tears at her heart, clawing up through her lungs. Her throat constricts and she tries to swallow past the lump but it stings at her eyes and she’s suddenly crying. The force of it is shaking her shoulders and her ribs are screaming but she just can’t stop it. She hadn’t had the chance to let the emotions of that day out before the surgery and she’s been so intent on everything else after it that there’s no stopping her tears. She’s never been good at keeping her sorrows pent up.

She’s trying to keep quiet but she must be making some noise because Steve’s hand tightens around hers and she looks up. He’s awake. She can see him trying to process what’s happening but he’s groggy and unfocused. She tries to hide her sniffles and quickly wipes at her cheeks but there’s really nothing for it. So, she leans forward and brushes a hand over his forehead, shushing him.

“Go back to sleep, Steve. I’m alright.” She cups his cheek in her palm and she swears he leans into the touch. She’s never seen him look quite as vulnerable as he does now and it startles her. “It’s late, we’ll talk tomorrow.” She waits for him to close his eyes and resume the light snoring before returning to her own bed. It’s really not that late at all but she’s suddenly exhausted. Tomorrow they’ll talk, but she’s still not sure she’s ready to tell him everything.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re nearing the end! I’ve also gone back and done some editing the chapters 3 and 4.

Today, Steve wakes up first. The sounds of the nurses—who are removing and replacing bandages, IVs, and other things—wakes Danny. The nurses take a moment to check on her own bandages and someone leaves them with breakfast. They eat without speaking and Danny can feel a strange sort of electricity snapping in the space between them. She’s a little uncertain if Steve was awake enough yesterday afternoon to remember her minor freak out at his beside. She keeps sneaking glances at him. Should she say something? Wait until he’s fed? Maybe she should find him some coffee? She isn’t sure what to do and it’s making her restless. _This is not an early morning conversation_ , she thinks, stabbing at her eggs. _Just shut up and eat your damn breakfast._ But Steve has picked up on it and when she takes her next glance at him, he gives her an exasperated look. She just looks back down and picks at her toast. She hears him sigh and set down his plasticware.

“Will you spit it out?” Steve sounds irritated. “I know you’ve got something to say. I can see your brain spinning.”

“Shut up and eat your eggs, Steven,” she growls out.

“You were pretty upset yesterday, buddy. Are you ok?” Steve asks, his voice is intentionally soft. Danny hoped he wouldn’t remember. She refuses to look at him.

“Just drop it. Please?”

“Fine.” He’s irritated but still tired so they settle into a tense peace.

She doesn’t mean to wait so long. Really. But by the time Steve is well enough to get around in a wheelchair by himself, he takes that to mean he can get back to work. Not literally, much to his disappointment, but for once in the long time Danny has known him, Steve is actually happy to be doing something productive besides blowing things up. And that means paperwork. So amid the filling out of forms and the visits from friends and family, Danny falls back into their routine of bickering and teasing.

And then they’re discharged. And Danny goes home to sleep in her own bed, in her own room. _Alone, finally_ , she thinks when she gets home. She showers and stumbles into bed. Only, she can’t sleep.

The third night, she tosses and turns for hours before falling into an uneasy slumber just before dawn. They aren’t clear to resume work at the office yet so she lays in bed an extra few hours to try to make up for the terrible night.

Danny assumes it’s just because she needs to adjust to her bed again. Or possibly it’s because she’s not used to the complete darkness of her room at home. So it takes her a few more nights of restless sleep before she realizes what it is. And then she feels like an idiot.

Steve.

She’s grown so used to having him just out of arms reach nearly at all times that she can’t sleep without him there. She’d grown accustomed to listening to his sleep chatter or his soft snores, to marking the rise and fall of his chest. She misses him with an ache. There’s only one thing for it.

On the sixth night—after fighting with herself about it—Danny gets up and, throwing off her sheets, gets out of bed. She barely brushes her teeth and doesn’t even bother to change into something a little more appropriate, only throws a sweater on over her pajama top, before jumping in her car and driving on autopilot to Steve’s. Sooner than probably legal, she’s on Steve’s doorstep banging on the door, never minding that it’s nearly two in the morning and Steve is likely asleep.

She realizes she hasn’t thought of what she’s going to say to him when the door opens. And there he is. Steve stands in his doorway, soft and bleary-eyed, clad in only sleep shorts. The outside lamp lighting him beautifully. Danny’s mouth goes dry.

It doesn’t take long for Steve to become irritated. He shuffles on his feet and the crease between his brows deepens.

“What is it, Danny?” His words are short but she pays no mind. She just steps into his space. When he doesn’t move, she take another step until she’s so close that she has to tilt her head up to look him in the eye. She doesn’t know what to say until she says it.

“I love you,” the words stumble from her mouth but she stands her ground. For a moment, she doesn’t think Steve is going to say anything. His face is pinched and confused. He shifts again.

“Yeah, I know. Danny, what’s going on?” He doesn’t understand. Danny sighs and pushes her way into his house and he closes the door behind them. She turns to face him.

“I am in love with you.” She’s deliberate with the way she says it. Slow and clearly, so he doesn’t misinterpret her words. Steve stills.

“What?” There is something in his voice that makes her heart jump. And in that moment, Steve is eight years younger, calling her Danno for the first time with no idea what they’ve gotten themselves into yet. The stress and worry are still there, will always be there what with the things Steve has seen. But the years slide from his eyes and Danny would give anything for that. Not that she doesn’t absolutely adore the older, softer, slightly more level-headed version of Steve who’s standing in front of her. She only wishes she could take away the hurt and pain of the past several years. So, she says it again.

“I’m in love with you. And I know I probably should have told you a long time ago, like years ago, only I didn’t even know until you…” The words _almost died_ get stuck in her throat. “Then you got shot and I just… it hit me, you know? And it’s been killing me to keep this in so I figure, why should I? I mean, you love me, too. Right?” She takes a deep breath because Steve’s still just staring at her, his mouth still a bit open. “Steve? I’m not wrong about that, am I?” He just stares at her, still standing too far away. She watches as his expression changes and a slow smile spreads across his lips. She grins back. “You gonna say something, you dope?”

Steve moves and it’s like watching a tightly wound spring uncoil. And he’s charging towards her, long legs bringing him close in a matter of seconds. The intensity in his eyes shocks her and she nearly takes a step back. He reaches out, one hand at her neck with his thumb brushing along her jaw and other wrapping around the back of her neck to tangle into her hair. He leans down and kisses her. And it feels like coming home.

Danny wraps her arms around him, melting into him, and holds on tight. She pours everything into the kiss, all her worry, her fear, her hope, and most of all, love. And Steve accepts all of it, happily, licking into her mouth and kissing her soundly.

She’s light headed by the time he releases her and Steve has that soft, fond look in his eyes.

“I’ve wanted to do that for far too long,” he whispers. And it’s Danny’s turn to freeze. She leans back to look at him and his hands slip from her neck to her shoulders.

“How long?” She asks, her voice clipped. Because in her hindsight she knows they were always teetering on the edge of something but for Steve to have known for certain for a lot longer than her and to not have said anything, it bothers her.

Something flashes behind Steve’s eyes and he ducks his head. He looks sheepish. And a little amused. But he doesn’t say anything. She steps away from him. “How long, Steven?” She hits him on the shoulder and he looks at her.

“Since Korea,” he finally says. “When you and the team and Joe rescued me.” It’s like a punch to her gut and she braces herself on her knees. “When did you know?” He asks. But she takes her time to answer, standing straight and making a beeline for his liquor cabinet to pour herself a glass of whiskey. She throws back the first one and pours a second. “You gonna share that, buddy?” She turns to him, takes a large swallow and glares at him. She takes another moment to breathe before she speaks.

“I didn’t know, not really. And not for a long time.” She says it more to her glass than Steve because she can’t look at him without her heart breaking for the lost time. She puts her empty glass on the counter and leans her back into it. She watches him for a moment and sighs, eyes going soft. “Why didn’t you say anything, babe?”

“I don’t—I don’t know. What could I have said anyway? It’s not exactly a mid-case conversation, Danny.”

“What could you have—no no, I remember. McGarrett men, different breed, all that bullshit. Steve, do you—?” She pauses, her frustration suddenly gone. She can keep asking him questions, keep wondering why they didn’t act sooner or why she hadn’t seen it before but she doesn’t want to. She wants to move forward, move on. She pulls a hand through her hair, twisting her fingers through the ends, and shakes her head. “You know what? Fuck it.”

She reaches out, moving into Steve’s space, and pulls his lips to hers. Steve doesn’t miss a beat, just wraps his arms around her and holds her close. He gets his hands under her ass and lifts her, her legs going around his waist automatically. Without breaking the kiss, he leads them out of the kitchen to the couch where he sits and settles her in his lap. She threads her hands through his hair and pulls a little to get a better angle. When she bites down on his lip, worrying it between her teeth, Steve gasps into her mouth.

“Don’t you think,” he says between kisses. “We should… um… talk about this?” Danny pulls back to look at him amusedly.

“Now he wants to talk,”she grins down at him. “Babe, we’ve put this off far too long. So no, no I do not want talk. I want to do this,” and she rolls her hips against him. Steve groans and tries to grab at her but she slides off him and holds out a hand. “Take me to bed, Steve.”

They take the stairs slowly, every step intentional. When they reach Steve’s room, he lifts her up. Danny’s laughter breaks the intensity and it’s so perfectly them. She pulls him down and climbs atop his lap, throwing her sweater somewhere on the floor. She moves in to kiss him, just barely a brush of lips, but suddenly leans back. Steve makes a sound, not quite a groan but something a bit softer.

“Shh, just… let me look at you.” She puts her hands on his chest, feeling him solidly beneath her. The doctor’s words still ring in her ears, an echoing chorus of _hewilldiehewilldie_. “I almost lost you.” She’s not even sure she’s said it out loud but Steve’s expression changes, a flicker of amusement on him lips.

“If this is about the liver—”

“Would you just… shut up, Steven?” She leans in and bites down on his earlobe. The heated groan he makes this time is louder. “That’s better.” Steve gets his arms around her and rolls them over.

“Why haven’t we done this before, Danny?” He asks, sucking at a spot behind her jaw. She rolls her eyes.

“You wanna talk? Fine.” She squeezes her way out from under him and sits up. She pushes her hand through her hair to get it out of her eyes and levels him with her best glare. “You wanna know why we’ve never done this before? Because you’ve never said anything. Instead, you’ve thrown yourself into every dangerous situation possible over the last six years and I’ve been, unknowingly, keeping a safe distance because my heart couldn’t take it if something happened to you. And when something did happen, you wanna know what I did? You wanna know, Steven?” She keeps going, voice rising with every word. “I almost killed a man in cold blood. I mean, he was shooting at me but by the time I’d caught up to him and put a bullet in his left shoulder, he’d lost his gun. But the point still stands. He shot you, Steve. You were bleeding out on tacky helicopter carpet and there was nothing I could do about it.” She bangs a fist on his bare chest, careful of the still healing incision there.

“You almost died. And I know I was nagging on you about the liver when we were in the hospital but I am terrified, Steven, that you’re going to get yourself back into some life threatening situation and I’m not going to be able to help you!” She leans her head into him and he catches her, soothing a hand up and down her back. They’re quiet, then, just letting Danny’s words sink in. “That was… um… off topic a bit, sorry. And I didn’t mean to yell.” She hears his laughter rumbling in his chest and he leans down to press a kiss to her head.

“I know I’m not always careful in the field, sometimes there’s just no time to think and I have to make split second decisions. And yeah, sometimes it doesn’t go as well as either of us would like, but Danny,” he says, brushing his fingers through her hair. “You have to trust me.” Danny sits up and looks at him, his hand still in her hair.

“I do.” She may yell at him for his impulsive behavior but she really does trust him to make whatever decision is necessary, in the field and off. “It’s me I don’t trust.” She laughs softly, a small wry sound, and shakes her head. “Do you think it’s worth it? This risk we’re about to take?”

Steve grips the back of her neck and it grounds her a little. He looks at her, suddenly very serious.

“Danny, do you really think it’s going to change anything?” And his words hit her square in the chest. He’s right and she’d thought the same thing back in the hospital. They’ve basically been a couple for the past several years, with the taking care of each other and the bickering and the gratuitous touching. The only thing that will change is that now it will all be intentional.

Steve smiles at her she knows he’s seen the realization play out on her face. He looks at her all soft and she wonders if that’s because it’s the middle of the night or because they’ve finally got this thing right. Then she remembers that it really is the middle of the night and she hasn’t been sleeping well the whole week and suddenly she’s very, very tired.

“Can we just sleep tonight?” She asks, leaning into his hand, and Steve nods. “I can take the couch if you want.” But Steve grabs her and pins her under him, a grin on his lips.

“You aren’t going anywhere, Danno.”

“Are you still gonna need to control everything?” She asks but doesn’t bother struggling, perfectly content where she is. Steve just laughs and rolls over on his back, pulling her with him. She settles on his chest, her hand reaching up to rest at his neck, and Steve wraps an arm around her back. She knows they’ll move at some point but the feeling of security that it brings is more than enough to make up for any minor discomfort.

She knows they have more details to work out together, like what do they tell the team and when do they tell the team and is kissing at work allowed or would it be completely unprofessional? But for now, Danny is content to fall into a deep sleep. They’ll worry about the rest later.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we’ve reached the end. It’s short and sweet but I didn’t want to drag it out. A huge thank you to all you readers, it really does mean a lot.
> 
> If anybody wants more from these two crazy kids, don’t hesitate to ask!
> 
> As always, if it sucks, please let me know.

Turns out, they don’t have to worry about any of it. In part, because the team was already well aware of their romantic entanglement long before either Steve or Danny knew. But also because they’re right, nothing changes.

They’re okay-ed by the doctor to go back to work—albeit with several side notes intended to keep them both healthy—two weeks after Danny showed up on Steve’s doorstep.

They’ve been spending most of their time together but Danny has Grace on the weekend and Steve has plans with Chin so they spend most of their last weekend of rest at their own places. Which means they don’t drive in together. And that thought Danny had about inappropriate behavior at work goes right out of her head when she spots Steve waiting for her in the parking lot, leaning oh-so-casually against his truck. They manage to make it inside and into the office—and it’s early enough that the rest of the team isn’t there yet—without an incident. But then Steve steers her to his office by the shoulders.

“A little pushy there, aren’t you, babe?” She says it with a smirk as he closes the door. Steve doesn’t say anything, only proves her point by pushing her up against a wall. “Here, really? You do know these walls are glass, right?” Steve only hums and leans in to kiss her. It’s telling how far gone she is that she just doesn’t care.

Their moment is broken, before they can get too far, by the sound of laughter and applause. Danny spins around and sees Kono, Chin, and Lou by the table. She feels her face heat. She turns back to Steve, who’s grinning like an idiot in love, and she whacks him on the shoulder. Kono cheers as she leaves the office and walks to her own. She gives a wave and a “thanks a lot guys” as she opens her door to hide.

A couple days later, they catch a case and as Danny predicted, Steve throws himself full force into it. And also as she predicted, it’s a point of contention between them. But the bickering and worrying and teasing is so natural that every time Steve looks at her a little too long or touches her a little too often, she doesn’t feel any differently than she did about a month ago.

Steve tears his stitches going after a suspect, of course, and Danny has zero problem voicing her irritation over it. But Steve throws in a “thank you” and an almost casual-enough-for-work “I love you” and her mood is perceptibly lighter by the time the case wraps up. It’s all so incredibly normal.

They pass on celebratory drinks with the team that evening in favor of rest. It’s Steve’s idea and Danny is sure that he’s trying to placate her. He certainly doesn’t look surprised when she parks the Camaro in his driveway. Inside, he takes her hand and they walk up the stairs to his room. Standing at the foot of his bed, Danny thinks for a brief moment that he’s going to make a move but then he sways on his feet. She grabs his shoulders to steady him.

“You’re actually tired, aren’t you?” She can’t help the soft laughter that bubbles out when Steve leans his head into her shoulder. She presses a kiss to the side of his head before pulling him gently down with her onto the bed. She lays his head on her chest and half of him is sort of draped halfway across her. “You have to start being more careful, Steve,” she tells him. “I’m not gonna let you die on me and you know you’re stuck with me now, so unless you want me yelling at you about it in front of everybody, you have to listen to me.” Steve hums and snuggles into her.

“Stuck with you, huh?” His voice is muffled by her shirt but it’s sleepy and soft and it rumbles against her ribs pleasantly. “Absolutely, babe.” She brushes her fingers through this hair and tightens her hold around him. His weight is pressing into her but she doesn’t mind. They’re both nearly asleep when he mumbles into her again.

“That doesn’t sound so bad, Danno.”


End file.
